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Platforms: Xbox 360, Xbox One, PlayStation 3, PlayStation 4, PC

Developer: MachineGames

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“Can I play, Daddy?”

Nazis? – Check. Lots of bullets? – Check. What could possibly go wrong?

Wolfenstein: The New Order is a Chimera – genetically. Depending from where you take a DNA sample you’re going to get 1 of 2 results: Old school or New. This leads to an inconsistent gaming experience that can be frustrating to play at times as it feels like the game never quite knows what it wants to be.

It has health packs and hit points but you regenerate health in lumps of 20. It has Duel-Wield but also ADS (which is more accurate therefore more practical). It has secret passages but they lead to nowhere important. It has epic enemies but they’re mainly fought in scripted events.You get the point…

Additionally the game’s cutscenes and occasional quiet moments have the protagonist spouting philosophical nonsense in the face of its carefree and completely unserious gameplay and story. I can’t decide if it is a product of unclear vision resulting in an inconsistent design philosophy or if it is sardonic in tone in some vain attempt to mock the industry or the game’s genre the way Spec Ops did to such awesome effect.

If Wolfenstein is going against Spec Ops it better bite the pillow because Specs Ops is going to make Wolf its bitch.

I hope for Wolfenstein’s sake it just has bad design…